Have your children ever accused you of being the meanest mom in the world? I swear I must have a special power over my children, they BOTH made that accusation today. They must thing that I take that as an insult or something, the poor things!
I know that I am usually nice to everyone. I usually care too much about what other people think of me, but NOT when it comes to my kids. They must have the mistaken notion that those same general rules apply to them too.
Why don't those rules apply to my children? I'm not SUPPOSED to be their friend, I'm their mom. It's my job to teach them to eat and act appropriately so they can grow up to make good choices when they become adults.
When a child gets so frustrated while playing a challenging video game that they're screaming at the tv, red in the face, throwing things, and stomping their feet should I really allow that behavior to continue? I gave appropriate warnings. I said if the behavior continued they wouldn't be allowed to play any more games today. Is it MY fault they didn't choose to turn off the tv or find some other less frustrating game to play? Son was going to run away from home because I'm so mean to him.
Peanut didn't feel the need to eat dinner tonight. She ate bread and crackers but no veggies and no soup. Hmm, WHY does she seem to think she'd get anything else to eat after dinner when she didn't even attempt to eat anything healthy? But it's not fair, he got more food than I did. Did I refuse to feed her? Did I take her spoon away so she had no way to eat her food? I explained to her the consequences of not eating before she made the decision.
Why is it their decisions are somehow MY fault? The consequences of all decisions were clearly defined and they chose the behaviors with negative consequences anyway. Should I get in trouble for following through and doing what I said I was going to do?
So all of you moms out there ... how are you the meanest mom? I need to find some more ways to use my super mom powers to torment my poor unsuspecting children (Pets too, but DON'T even get me started about their growling and fighting the last two days!). Muwhhaha!
Thank you for stopping by. Please leave me a message. I'd love to hear your thoughts!
Cindy
Do NOT Copy
14 comments:
I have won the honor so many times I forgot how I did it(-: LOL Stick with it because they do grow up and they will appreciate your efforts(-:
Yes, I was a mean Mom too! however, my daughter has seemed to change her view since her daughter has turned two :). My Mom was also mean when I was growing up...let's not even talk about Dad's! LOL
I recently suggested to a Mother I work with
Blessings,
Kathi :)
Don't ya just love the food thing!? Mine have it to a science....after school snack that stretches into a small meal (exhausted brain power), then tidbits at supper. My son's not bad because he is almost 16, 6 foot and 240 lbs, he eats me out of house and home! But my daughter! Not only am I mean, I feel bad to tell her "no, before bed snack", and as kids do.....play it up!!!!!
YHE!! Go GIRL!!!! LOL!!!
I´m totaly with you!
Linda
Hey when they start saying your mean, you must be doing your job! lol I've heard this so many times I can't even count on my fingers & toes combined. :)
Cinj, you are doing the right thing. You sound like a good mom. I reared 2 girls, and 2 boys. I remember those days, one day especially: older daughter was sitting on the floor leaning against the frig and talking to me while I prepared dinner; the others were coming and going. She was about 13 or 14 and whatever it was she was talking about I had absolutely nothing to do with; she had twisted it around until it was all my fault. Finally, I said, "If you don't get up from there and hush, I'm going to step on you and squash you like a worm." She laughed, she knew exactly what she was doing. Then I laughed, too, because I knew she knew. I used to tell them I was not in a popularity contest and they didn't have to like me, but I planned to stay firm with them because I was their mom.
When our son would tell me I was mean...I would chant this:
"I so mean my toes are green!" I had a million rhymes. We would laugh and laugh.
Gail
My meaness came out tonight when I had he parenting opportunity to make him actually learn his spelling words. He was very pitiful, but he will pass that test.
Cindee- If we only got ribbons for our meanness so we could keep track of them all.
Kathi- Funny how a little time adds a different perspective on things.
Dawn- Oh geez, don't even get me started. We had a similar routine tonight. No wonder I dislike cooking sometimes!
Linda- :)
Racquel- You've got that right. Yay for us mean moms.
Barbee- It's funny how so many parents want to be their kids' friend. While it's nice to get along with our children I feel that it's more important to teach them how to function properly in our world.
Gail- Too funny. I suppose it works better to diffuse the tension than allowing him to stomp out of the room and slam into his bedroom.
Debbi- That's the way! He'll be glad when he's older and knows how to spell those words. He can be a walking, talking dictionary for his friends who are too lazy to look up the words.
lol. Good post Cinj. I used to tell my Mom that all the time and now that I have a daughter, I totally get it! Funny how that works, huh?! I agree children need parents instead of friends so it's good you can stay strong!
This is such a familiar story, although I should say my kids are getting older, and a bit more civilised (the result of a lifetime of mean-mom regime!). I always quote them that Tammy Wynette song, the one that goes: "And when you add it all up, The full cost of my love is no charge." That soon shuts them up. In fact, they can't wait to leave the room...
Kathleen- Funny how that can come around and bite us when we become parents. I think my sister said that kind of thing to my parents a whole lot more than I ever dreamed of.
Victoria- I hope that day rolls around here soon. Sometimes it seems like my kids "get" it and other times they just seem like they're so completely clueless that they'll never get it.
I wasn't a mean mom but sure did expect my kids to tow the line and of course was accused of it all: I was mean, I was unfair, I didn't love them, I didn't want them to have fun, I didn't trust them, blah, blah, blah. I always acknowledged that I understood how they felt, and that when I was a kid I thought my mom was mean too, and when they grew up and had kids, their kids would sometimes think they were mean too. Letting them know I understood how they felt didn't mean they could do whatever they wanted, and that breaking the rules leads to consequences for everyone, not just kids, and that everyone has rules and responsibilities. It also helped strenghten my own resolve, and while they'd still whine and argue, they knew I meant business. I told them I knew they didn't believe me now, but one day they would appreciate and understand why I expected the things I did from them. I told them they were awesome kids who would become awesome adults and it was my job to make sure they grew up to be healthy, safe, responsible, and kind. And guess what. . . they did!
If you're not hearing that from your kids, then you're doing something wrong! :) When my son was little, it started with whining: "Talk to me in that voice and you'll never get your way!". Then it was crying real tears over being denied a toy at the store: "Life isn't fair and people don't act right-get over it!" (Which was also followed :) I think that if you show your children respect, they return it most of the time and the discipline goes over a little easier. For instance, I wouldn't let adults interrupt him when he was talking to me, same as I expected from him. Treat your kids as respectfully as you treat your friends, and you can't go wrong, IMO. (Of course, he's 25 now and "out of my hair", so I'm not in full battle gear anymore ;-)
Post a Comment